Lurker, good looking with social anxiety

Share your experiences with the opposite sex. Suggest ways to improve your success. Analyze the behavior of females in real life and online. Rant and rave about females. Show the importance of looks pertaining to attracting females and other social situations. Discuss aesthetics and the science of attractiveness. Exchange health, nutrition and looksmaxing tips.



justinboober wrote:You aren't as good looking as you think you are. Your fear of posting your pic here is just a way to protect your coping mechanism.

Social anxiety & good looks are mutually exclusive. Everyting a good looking person says or does is halo'd by the FACE. The endless positive feedback from their external environment makes it impossible to be anti-social, nervous, etc...


I dont agree at all.

Tyroon wrote:
justinboober wrote:You aren't as good looking as you think you are. Your fear of posting your pic here is just a way to protect your coping mechanism.

Social anxiety & good looks are mutually exclusive. Everyting a good looking person says or does is halo'd by the FACE. The endless positive feedback from their external environment makes it impossible to be anti-social, nervous, etc...


I dont agree at all.


You will eventually

The halo effect is VERY real, good looking people get respected no matter what

Its a hard pill to swallow

Rolex wrote:
Tyroon wrote:
I dont agree at all.


You will eventually

The halo effect is VERY real, good looking people get respected no matter what

Its a hard pill to swallow


I get no respect at all in social situations due to my anxiety. People way uglier talk over me, hell even little kids talk over me. Brio wrote the same in another thread I saw searching his history.



Tyroon wrote:
I dont agree at all.


You can't rate yourself as good-looking based on selective observations from family members, friends, that one time...

Are you on Tinder? Post screenshots of messages you've exchanged w/ attractive girls.
Eww face?
Know your place.
Image

justinboober wrote:You aren't as good looking as you think you are. Your fear of posting your pic here is just a way to protect your coping mechanism.

Social anxiety & good looks are mutually exclusive. Everyting a good looking person says or does is halo'd by the FACE. The endless positive feedback from their external environment makes it impossible to be anti-social, nervous, etc...


You honestly can't still believe this with the amount of good looking guys on here who can't get laid? So what if they don't have an external environment? Depending on many factors, a good looking guy can easily come from a secluded or dysfunctional environment, where they received none of all this so called positive feedback that you're so sure constantly exists in their lives. If you don't get that in your formative years, it can stick with you for life.

Or what about the ugly duckling types, who were ugly kids, but had a great puberty or 20's and became good looking later in life? The limited feedback they are getting now may take years to undue all the negative they received as a child. Add the fact that guys in general just aren't validated like women are, and a good looking guy who keeps mostly to himself may never get much validation, or even realize what it is when it happens.

justinboober wrote:
Tyroon wrote:
I dont agree at all.


You can't rate yourself as good-looking based on selective observations from family members, friends, that one time...

Are you on Tinder? Post screenshots of messages you've exchanged w/ attractive girls.


I havent tried tinder yet, Ive had girls on other dating sites wanting to meet up with me, telling me Im hot.

Listen Ive heard for almost the past 10 years Im great looking, Its just obvious. I know of the features which are good looking, I have many of them. Girls tell me Im good looking very very often. You can beleieve whatever you want I dont try to convince you more.

I would say this, look at other guys on here who are good looking but anxious.



Social anxiety is a serious problem that can get worse when repetitive avoidance behaviour kicks in.

I suggest anyone with this problem speak to your doctor about starting a long term low dose of SSRI medication. In addition to this, read as much as you can about breathing. Learn the slow breathing exercises of spiritual masters. Control your breathing and you can control or even conquer your anxieties.

In addition to the above, do regular meditation and download some self hypnosis audio programs to listen to every night as you fall asleep.

Literally have NO sympathy for cunts that claim to be good looking yet lay their failures on their "social anxiety".

ALL YOU NEED TO FUCKING DO IS SAY YES.

LEARN.

YES.

FUCKING SAY YES.

THAT'S IT.

WHEN YOU'RE GOOD LOOKING IT DOESN'T MATTER.

You're probably severely overrating yourself or you're yet ANOTHER cunt who wants these sad motherfuckers here to give your cretin ass attention.

Fucking jab some old used heroin needles in your eyes cunt.
Image

Spartacus wrote:You honestly can't still believe this with the amount of good looking guys on here who can't get laid? So what if they don't have an external environment? Depending on many factors, a good looking guy can easily come from a secluded or dysfunctional environment, where they received none of all this so called positive feedback that you're so sure constantly exists in their lives. If you don't get that in your formative years, it can stick with you for life.

Or what about the ugly duckling types, who were ugly kids, but had a great puberty or 20's and became good looking later in life? The limited feedback they are getting now may take years to undue all the negative they received as a child. Add the fact that guys in general just aren't validated like women are, and a good looking guy who keeps mostly to himself may never get much validation, or even realize what it is when it happens.


I define good looking as a 7/10+. When a guy is a legit 7, he cannot fail with women unless he makes a conscious effort otherwise. Make no mistake, women will HUNT a good looking guy down if she really wants his attention. Good looking guys don't worry about what to say or do next because there's so little chance of negative feedback. OP is average, hence why his personality is inhibited. He doesn't have enough assurance women find him attractive.

I think using sluthate members is a bad example. While there are way too many normal fags here, I've yet to see a true 7, the closest I've seen is user LMSwastheanswer.
Last edited by justinboober on Fri Jan 16, 2015 11:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

justinboober wrote:
I define good looking as a 7/10+. When a guy is a legit 7, he cannot fail with women unless he makes a conscious effort otherwise. Make no mistake, women will HUNT a good looking guy down if she really wants his attention. Good looking guys don't worry about what to say or do next because there's so little chance of negative feedback. OP is average, hence why his personality is inhibited. He doesn't have the assurance women find him attractive.

I think using sluthate members is a bad example. While there are way too many normal fags here, I've yet to see a true 7, the closest I've seen is user LMSwastheanswer.


Inb4 OP posts a heavily photoshopped picture to "prove us wrong".

gobman3000 wrote:
Inb4 OP posts a heavily photoshopped picture to "prove us wrong".


Doubtful man. Besides, I've filed any account w/ less than 50 posts under TROLL. We'll see what he does, I'm just posting in here cause I was stuck in gridlock traffic :lol:
PostThis post by Zyzz was deleted by puanewb on Tue Mar 03, 2015 9:41 pm.
Reason: requested

Unfortunately it seems like theres not that many people here who can offer an intelligent non emotional discussion. It is almost as if many of you actually identify so much with this that you get pissed off when someone talks about a differ in experience.

justinboober wrote:I define good looking as a 7/10+. When a guy is a legit 7, he cannot fail with women unless he makes a conscious effort otherwise. Make no mistake, women will HUNT a good looking guy down if she really wants his attention. Good looking guys don't worry about what to say or do next because there's so little chance of negative feedback. OP is average, hence why his personality is inhibited. He doesn't have enough assurance women find him attractive.

I think using sluthate members is a bad example. While there are way too many normal fags here, I've yet to see a true 7, the closest I've seen is user LMSwastheanswer.


If LMS isn't even a 7, what do you consider a 9? LMS is around top 1% of guys, having him rated anything under a 9 is a complete joke. You should adjust your rating system more in tune with reality. Brio is a perfect example of a real life 7-8 who's personality hurts his chances with women. Claiming he's not good looking is idiotic and pointless, because its what women like that counts, and I guarantee most women would agree that he's a good looking guy.

Spartacus wrote:
justinboober wrote:I define good looking as a 7/10+. When a guy is a legit 7, he cannot fail with women unless he makes a conscious effort otherwise. Make no mistake, women will HUNT a good looking guy down if she really wants his attention. Good looking guys don't worry about what to say or do next because there's so little chance of negative feedback. OP is average, hence why his personality is inhibited. He doesn't have enough assurance women find him attractive.

I think using sluthate members is a bad example. While there are way too many normal fags here, I've yet to see a true 7, the closest I've seen is user LMSwastheanswer.


If LMS isn't even a 7, what do you consider a 9? LMS is around top 1% of guys, having him rated anything under a 9 is a complete joke. You should adjust your rating system more in tune with reality. Brio is a perfect example of a real life 7-8 who's personality hurts his chances with women. Claiming he's not good looking is idiotic and pointless, because its what women like that counts, and I guarantee most women would agree that he's a good looking guy.


Yes I dont see how anyone could rate Brio any less than a 7. How is Brio only one point above average looking? Make no sense. And I seldom see women hunt a guy for his looks. Women hunt popular guys, athletes and all that, but never guys who are just good looking and nothing else.

Sure Ive had women approach me and all that, but talking with them for more like 2 minutes will make them lose all interest.

I believe OP and if you look somewhat good looking you'll understand what he is saying. Being a socialtard is worse than being a sub5 incel. The amount of times I've messed up with 7+ girls is unreal, you're not gonna fuck any girls if you are a boring cunt that barely says anything. Likewise you're not gonna fuck anyone being an ugly incel that's too loud. It's a mix of the 2, looks is much more important imo, but if you can't hold an interesting conversation you're not gonna get a hot girl, end of. People keep mentioning the "halo" effect but that shit ain't a miracle, you're not gonna be there with your palms sweating telling how many hours a day you spend on 4chan and she'll think its "cute", trust me, I've had girls tell each other they'd fuck me in front of me and if you can't keep the conversation going you'll get fuck all, they'll wonder off or just go elsewhere where she can have FUN, anxietyceldom is a real thing.

Before people hate on me, I'll let you know its totally possible to get girls being a retard, I say from experience (got with a 7/10 first party I went to after stopping being a selective mute) however, it is much easier and takes way less "luck" if you know what to say and how to behave, pua stuff is bullshit though.

Spartacus wrote:
If LMS isn't even a 7, what do you consider a 9? LMS is around top 1% of guys, having him rated anything under a 9 is a complete joke. You should adjust your rating system more in tune with reality. Brio is a perfect example of a real life 7-8 who's personality hurts his chances with women. Claiming he's not good looking is idiotic and pointless, because its what women like that counts, and I guarantee most women would agree that he's a good looking guy.


LMS is a 7 from what I saw but I also don't like basing a rating off of 1 pic.

Brio is over-rated. He's slightly above average at best IMO. Projecting what you think girls would think of him is pointless/irrelevant since we aren't the ones who ultimately have to deal with his penis. Is Brio on Tinder? That's really the only way to get honest feedback on him.
Last edited by justinboober on Sat Jan 17, 2015 12:49 am, edited 1 time in total.

Tyroon wrote:
And I seldom see women hunt a guy for his looks. Women hunt popular guys, athletes and all that, but never guys who are just good looking and nothing else.



Are you sure about that?
Image

david_chicago wrote:
bruxo wrote:I believe OP and if you look somewhat good looking you'll understand what he is saying. Being a socialtard is worse than being a sub5 incel. The amount of times I've messed up with 7+ girls is unreal, you're not gonna fuck any girls if you are a boring cunt that barely says anything. Likewise you're not gonna fuck anyone being an ugly incel that's too loud. It's a mix of the 2, looks is much more important imo, but if you can't hold an interesting conversation you're not gonna get a hot girl, end of. People keep mentioning the "halo" effect but that shit ain't a miracle, you're not gonna be there with your palms sweating telling how many hours a day you spend on 4chan and she'll think its "cute", trust me, I've had girls tell each other they'd fuck me in front of me and if you can't keep the conversation going you'll get fuck all, they'll wonder off or just go elsewhere where she can have FUN, anxietyceldom is a real thing.

Before people hate on me, I'll let you know its totally possible to get girls being a retard, I say from experience (got with a 7/10 first party I went to after stopping being a selective mute) however, it is much easier and takes way less "luck" if you know what to say and how to behave, pua stuff is bullshit though.


If you are legitimately good looking girls will come to you. This completely negates the need for social skills. Unless such a guy is completely isolated he will not be incel.


What does legitimately good looking even mean? Like top 0.0000000000001% of males? In the normal world, in classes, in school and on parties there are many guys who are considered good looking, way above average, by normal people. I am one of those guys, Its painfully obvious I have great looks.

Girls very rarely hunt me down, girls just dont do that shit unless ur a popular jock or celebrity. And the odd times they do, very often online, I mess up by being self consious while having a sober conversation in real life.

Actually, last time I was out drinking, but still somewhat sober, this girl approached me on the dance floor, we made out. Then we walked upstairs to the bar taking a drink talking for a bit. After a while she literally says 'are you nervous?!', even If I tried fake being cool, she could fucking sense I didnt feel I deserved her or something.. then after that, It was all odd and the whole vibe between us became weird, then she left.

That shit have happened before, girls giving me painfully obvious interest peaks, but then I talk to them and they lose interest in me, you can see it in their eyes how they become dissapointed Im so boring and anxious.

Girls have so many fucking options, they dont need to hunt guys and they want the whole package, good looking and a great conversationalist, funny and popular.

justinboober wrote:
Tyroon wrote:
And I seldom see women hunt a guy for his looks. Women hunt popular guys, athletes and all that, but never guys who are just good looking and nothing else.



Are you sure about that?
Image


Internet conversations doesnt mean nothing. Ive had such conversations, many of them. Then you go meet up with the girl and if you are sober and seem nervous to her, she will excuse her self. Ive experienced that several times now, they are intereted online, seem horny, then you meet them and Its like they are a complete different person in real life seeing me as weird.

What quality of girls are you guys claiming chases down guys? A guy who's a 7+ is going to want to date a 7+ girl. I'd rate these two girls as being around the 7-8 level.

Image
Image

Now I wouldn't be shocked at all seeing one of them in a relationship with a guy like Brio. But do you seriously think they'd "hunt" him down? No way, they have way to much attention as it is. So while they are within his dating range, he still has to be the one to court them and get the lay and/or relationship.

Why do you give a shit about your supposed looks level when it's your "personality" that's the problem?

Still trying to grasp straws and cling onto your coping mechanism that you're still decent looking eh?

david_chicago wrote:
Tyroon wrote:
What does legitimately good looking even mean? Like top 0.0000000000001% of males? In the normal world, in classes, in school and on parties there are many guys who are considered good looking, way above average, by normal people. I am one of those guys, Its painfully obvious I have great looks.

Girls very rarely hunt me down, girls just dont do that shit unless ur a popular jock or celebrity. And the odd times they do, very often online, I mess up by being self consious while having a sober conversation in real life.

Actually, last time I was out drinking, but still somewhat sober, this girl approached me on the dance floor, we made out. Then we walked upstairs to the bar taking a drink talking for a bit. After a while she literally says 'are you nervous?!', even If I tried fake being cool, she could fucking sense I didnt feel I deserved her or something.. then after that, It was all odd and the whole vibe between us became weird, then she left.

That shit have happened before, girls giving me painfully obvious interest peaks, but then I talk to them and they lose interest in me, you can see it in their eyes how they become dissapointed Im so boring and anxious.

Girls have so many fucking options, they dont need to hunt guys and they want the whole package, good looking and a great conversationalist, funny and popular.


Then what that means is that you are not good looking enough. The more good looking you are the more effort and compromises girls are willing to make with you.


Thats just weird. Not good looking enough? There are many guys who are very good looking, but not top tier like Brad Pitt prime, who still gets many many maaany girls. I know of guys who look way worse than me, but who get much more girls cause they know how to talk with them.

Not all is about looks, you have to be a normally function social being. Being nervous and self consious will kill it all.

david_chicago wrote:
If you are legitimately good looking girls will come to you. This completely negates the need for social skills. Unless such a guy is completely isolated he will not be incel.


This doesn't happen lol. Spartacus laid the reality down quite well in his previous post. When you're dealing with attractive girls, YOU have to make the moves and you have to lead and you have to entertain. Although girls have approached me before, they'll run out of conversation and give up, they won't say "awh he's a bit shy" when you're nervous talking to them by just answering their questions. Truth is you will have the opportunities to gain social skills but until you're a social person you're not gonna get any pussy.
PreviousNext

Topic Tags

Return to Shitty Advice

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Baidu [Spider] and 103 guests