So you're not you in that picture.
There's one thing you can control. Your breathing. Control it. Anxiety kicks in, your heart starts racing, make a point of breathing slowly. Might as well say, you should probably do this all day and maybe for years to come.
It ain't other people fucking with you. It's you fucking with you. If you have a pet, talk to it. Seriously, like it understands English. First, it's funny. I do it all the time. Amaze yourself by just inventing shit to say when you're talking to it.
That will help with being able to speak clearly. I do it because it's funny.
If you're all fucked up looking, go to a salon. Even if it's a gay guy, just tell him to give you a popular haircut. Do some pushups and control your breathing as you do.
I carry an inhaler. I breathe just fine, especially in the summer. I hardly have to use it at all. In the winter, my heart races and I can't catch my breath. This is anxiety, not asthma. The inhaler is prescribed. Speaking of which, see a doctor and tell the doctor everything that is a problem. Maybe you end up on an anti-depressant.
If you don't sleep well at night, and if this is every night, you're gonna be a fucking mess. Losing sleep won't kill you, but it can get bad enough that you start thinking maybe everything's better if it does kill you. This is also something to tell the doctor.
I take seroquel 100mg. It's not for the anti-psychotic effect, I take it because it knocks me out at night.
Back to the pushups. Do as many as you can, start with three sets, many as you can. Do them every day. Within a few weeks, your shoulders will square up. Take note of your posture. If your shoulders slouch forward, start making a point of keeping them back where they're supposed to be. The pushups will help.
If you eat fast food every day of your life, it ain't doing you no good. You can lose weight easily by not eating fast food every day. Find low calorie things to eat, shit you like. If you drink a lot of soda, it ain't doing you no good. Try Crystal Light. The raspberry is pretty good, and it's got no sugar. Sugar ain't doing you no good.
Look through the shit you get in the mail, from clothing stores. If you don't own any of the clothes you see in catalogs, time for a new wardrobe. Polo shirts are always good. T-shirts that don't say anything are good. If you're overweight, buy them so they hang loose but not down to your knees. Tuck them in.
You have acne? Take care of it. You go to some salon to get a real haircut, ask anyone working there what's good for acne or black heads, whatever.
And I can tell you all this, I have anxiety and it's been at least as bad as the way you describe yours. You go to the doctor, speak the facts. The doctor prescribes medication, take it. I also have a prescription of the lowest dose Ativan (lorazepam). It's just a general dose for some relief against my malfunctioning nervous system.
You might as well wait after class to talk to your teacher. These are people you can trust, I imagine. A doctor and a teacher. If someone busts your balls about being a weirdo, I've personally explained my situation to people I'd never seen before and will never see again. I've explained it to people I know.
I end up saying, every time, It's a stupid fucking problem, but it is a problem. They can take it or leave it, whatever. Now you've opened up a bit, taken care of yourself better, and maybe there's assholes who still bust your chops. See, those are assholes.
Guess what you say to them.
Goes like this... You know I have a problem but you figure you should make it a bigger problem. Something like this.
Then you tell the fucker, You're a fuckin asshole.
If you're afraid of getting beat up a bit, remember this. A fight in school works out like, a few punches are thrown and then you're wrestling around a bit before someone breaks it up.
Don't call everyone assholes. If they ain't bothering you, why bother them. Sooner or later, if you don't look like a fucking nervous wreck every minute of the day, you're taking care of yourself, you'll end up on sociable terms with most of the people you deal with everyday.
Might want to take up a sport, too. Sports have cured all kinds of problems. It's physical activity. If you ain't good at sports, all the more reason to join.
Seriously, you do this shit in a month, two months, by the time six months goes by, you'll be doing more pushups than you could before, your posture will square up. You'll have muscles showing in your arms and chest. Not huge, but noticeable. You'll look better if you take protein a couple times a day. Buy the cheap stuff at the supermarket, it's like 30 bucks and it'll last a month or more. Use it for meal or snack replacement. Eat regular meals, just start fitting protein shakes into your diet.
You live in your head. It's a bad place to live. It'll eat you alive, which I guess it's already doing. And don't go planning any fucking shooting sprees. Instead of looking at your problems as someone else's fault, that's a problem. Fault don't matter. One way or the other, you have a problem and it's up to you to do something about it.
Every single guy who ever lived was nervous around girls at some point. If you're one of those incels, I wouldn't rule out an Asian massage parlor. Get your feet and your dick wet. Wear a rubber. Men do these things. Married men do these things. I love massage parlors. No strings attached and, when you figure out how to act around girls, maybe go on match or something, you'll have some experience. It probably won't help if you end up getting laid, you'll blow your nut in a minute or less. Probably a bunch of times. Every guy on earth did this. All the dead ones, too.
Don't be lovesick. I've fucked this up before myself, get ahead of yourself. Things happen best in their own time.
Look through the social section of your Sunday paper. The pictures of couples getting married and couples who just got married. You won't see a bunch of supermodels. You won't see "chads." Regular people. If you want a supermodel, I don't know where you'd even begin.
This is all simple shit. But sitting in a room by yourself doing nothing about it every day of your life, all you're doing is buying more of the same for your future.
Be reserved but don't be afraid to speak. If you're into the weirdo things on the internet like "bronies" or "pikachu," I'd bet most girls don't know a thing about it and they'd like to keep it that way. If you have a dog, take it for walks. Lots of girls walk dogs. And then you have dogs to use to break the ice.
This is all I can think to tell you. Get out of your head.